Thursday, January 31, 2008

Pot Kettle Black Lung

Science finally sobered up today and made the following statement: "Dude... I think maybe pot is, like... bad for you..."

It's just occurred to science that smoking an excessive amount of marijuana can lead to the same health problems as smoking an excessive number of cigarettes, namely lung cancer, emphysema, and a constant, un-Fabreezable stench.

My interest in this is derived from a HAHA moment to all the idiot potheads that have been swearing up and down for years that smoking marijuana does zero damage to the human body ("it's like, medicinal, man...").  Some of these high-horses were even so bold as to constantly berate smokers of the original cancer stick (cigarettes) for doing irreparable harm to themselves.  Sorry to destroy the notion that nothing Bob Marley did could possibly be as horrendous an activity as... GASP!... smoking cigarettes.  I mean, he played fucking soccer, didn't he?

Studies show (and we all know every study that comes out in this fashion will never be contradicted by additional studies) that smoking 1 joint a day is slightly worse than smoking an entire pack of cigarettes (20 per).  At this rate, the pot smoker increases their risk of disease by 8% each year their habit (or, sorry, non-addictive hobby) continues while the Lucky Strikes addict gets lucky with a mere 7% annual increase in certain death.

In conclusion, who's got the giggles now, you self-important stoners?!  

Good, needed to get that off my chest before we find out this study was conducted by Phillip Morris.


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